Operation

I've been thinking alot lately. Who am I? Whose am I? Where am I going? Where have I been? Where I am I now? What am I going to do with my life? How will I accomplish this? Who will I rely on to accomplish this.

I've had doubts too. Many. Im not strong enough. Im not creative enough. Im not deep enough. Im not intelligent enough. Im not consistent enough. Im not whole enough. and the list goes on

As I begin to discern I learn. and wait in eager expectation for the anwsers to these questions and the constant love of a god who says "this is my plan for you my child".

I'm currently listening to a song by Third Day called "I will always be true". Its talking about how God says he will always be true and be a shoulder to cry on and how he will give me his life. The truth is my friend Im overwhelmed. Ive never felt so overwhelmed in my whole life. Overwhelmed by my Savior's soverignity. I am overwhelmed about who he has put in my life. The greatest people a kid could ask for. I mean seriously I have so many people that care about me deeply. and its like wow Lord thank you for blessing me with friends that love me. and then I encounter his love over and over again and its this downpour of relentless pursuing love of depth . i am blessed. I am covered by the king.

Have you ever played the game operation? I feel like Im that guy and God is the one playing and he knows what parts of my life I need and what parts I dont. Its this life sized version of the game where he knows what I need so he begins to take away the parts that aren't working or that hinder me or that draw me away from him and Im left with less... but so much more. I didn't need it all.

so my prayer becomes take it all Lord.Operate on my heart and let you be in the center of it. Purify me Lord. My sins are many. I am so broken. You are perfect and can make me whole.

He knows me better then I know myself and Im like woah. So i begin to follow his lead.

Love,
A daughter of the king.